“If you are not going to take things seriously, you better hope that your opponent isn’t going to either” said Club Chairman Dan Hoedeman after Sundays 11-0 wipeout of Rampage SC. “Unfortunately for Rampage, while they turned up to dick around we turned up to play ball.”
Eight players scored as Stegman’s Old Boys put Rampage to the sword.
The visiting team was unable to muster a single shot at goal, though they did manage to win a corner late in the second half when most of the Blues were playing ‘all time offense.’
“They were embarrassing” said the Manager Jon Bisswurm “and would struggle for points in the bottom division of the MRSL. They would for sure get a spanking from our Monday team. But at least it was a chance for shooting practice.”
The match was over as a competitive affair less than ten minutes in, with Mike Logan and Al Vo scoring easily. Vo’s, in particular, was a lovely piece of skill.
The deluge kept coming, and the Old Boys were up 7-0 at the half.
Sean Webb had a delightful nutmeg of a defender and chip over the goalkeeper to emphasize the Blues’ unhappiness at having their time wasted.
“Those guys were garbage” Webb said afterward.
Only the referees kept the game within reason, chalking off another Webb goal for offsides after he dribbled past a defender and calling back a Dan Hoedeman goal for offsides after the goalkeeper dropped the ball at his feet under no pressure and Hoedeman smashed it into the goal.
“We know these referees well” said Hoedeman “and we know what they are capable of, though they never cease to surprise us. Offsides while dribbling? I’d say you’re having a laugh but this crew emphatically is not.”
Stegman’s Old Boys (3-4-3): Overlie, Sturdy, Castro-Malaspina, Pennings, Thomas, Bisswurm, Webb, Warner, Vo, Maier, Logan
Subs: Hoedeman, Peichel, Keeler