Tommy McCarthy Signs On The Dotted Line

Tommy Mccarthy was unveiled as the newest signing for Stegman’s Old Boys this Sunday as the Englishman put pen to paper on a deal that takes him from non-league side Bedfont Town and his native London to a new start in Minneapolis.

Midfielder Tommy McCarthy is revealed by Old Boys manager Jon Bisswurm

“We’re very excited to be able to announce that we’ve signed Tommy” said Club Manager Jon Bisswurm “because he is the type of player that a side like ours needs to attract to keep moving forward. He’s also built like a brick sh*thouse, so in addition to an adhesive touch and great vision I have the expectation that he’ll do a bit of the tackling dirty work in the middle of the park the only response from his victims will be ‘thank you, sir, may I have another?'”

Mccarthy is from Hounslow in the United Kingdom and joins Holger Meiser (Eppelborn, Germany) and Yohann Charlet (Rennes, France) to give the Blues a European flavor.

“We founded this club just a few short years ago” said Club Chairman Dan Hoedeman “and we founded it with a bold vision, as bold in its own way as LA Galaxy’s when they signed David Beckham. Well, Tommy is our own Beckham except he doesn’t wear a sari and knows how to spell his own name.”

Given the number 8 shirt, the expectation from fans is that Mccarthy will slot right into the team and contribute immediately.

“That is the expectation, yes” continued Bisswurm “but at this point our supporters must know that every signing is expected to be – and has been – a contributor on and off the field from day one. It’s no different with this one.”

Mccarthy himself was a bit reticent at the unveiling, but when pressed was happy to say that whole thing was “reem.”

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