old boys add warner to roster in transfer day coup

Monday’s transfer drama was not restricted to the Premier League as Stegman’s Old Boys produced an extraordinary coup on the last day of January by signing Kansas-born starlet Daniel Warner.

Jon Bisswurm and Nick Sindt announce new signing Daniel Warner

Warner became the latest in a number of high-profile additions that the Old Boys have made in the close season and will form a potent attack with fellow new signings Pete Manning, Sean Webb and Paul Diegnau, not to mention the current high-caliber players already firmly ensconced at Arlington Park. Warner, a striker whose resume includes four years of NAIA ball in his home state of Kansas, is expected to make an immediate impact.

“We’ve got ourselves quite a player” said Manager Jon Bisswurm shortly after the official unveiling “and I have no doubts that he will dominate at this level, helping us to match our fearsome defensive record with a clinical attack. Why do I have no doubts? Simple. Every one of my personnel decisions is correct. I’m like the Pope of amateur soccer talent scouting – infallible. That, and I have the FIFA Lab.”

How to stop Warner is a dilemma that few have found an answer to, and it will be all the more difficult as MRSL defenses get their first look at the devastating scorer that scouts say matches brilliant link-up play and intelligent movement off the ball with his legendary eye for goal.

“It would not be far-fetched to say that we have the best scouting network in Minnesota amateur soccer” said General Manager Nick Sindt. “People asked me how we out-maneuvered a desperate Newcastle United for Warner’s signature and I just say nothing and smile as I sneakily dispose of Dan’s passport.”

2 thoughts on “old boys add warner to roster in transfer day coup

  1. this is classic. This website keeps getting better and better! Can we design an iPhone app so I can get push notifications of breaking news like this lol?

    • Don’t count it out Jon, it just may happen…Our site is mobi in case you did not know. plus we are in the process of a total redesign.

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